Wedding traditions all over the world are part of every nation’s culture. But as time ages, even these traditions evolve. Modern lifestyle and foreign influences may have altered old wedding customs. So whose decision will prevail? That of the elders of the family or the couple to wed?
In a few hours, my cousin will walk down the aisle to start her own forever with her American boyfriend. When the wedding invites were distributed to our clan, ehem, the elders started raising questions. Why is it that the primary sponsors will also play the roles of the secondary sponsors? Meaning, ang mga ninong at ninang ang s’ya ring naka-assign sa cord, veil, at candle. Then someone remarked, “Ay yun na yata ang uso ngayon eh!”.
Gerlie and I have hosted a couple of weddings (for GirlYana) here in Batangas. We had a client whose own plans for his wedding were compromised with the elders’ reminders of including old customs in the reception. He wanted to infuse modern gimmicks in the programme and discard old traditions but to avoid offending their relatives, he followed the elders’ command.
Eating rice cakes, sharing a bottle of drink, showering of rice grains and petals, these are just some of the old wedding customs here in the Philippines. There is also the money dance where guests pin money to the newlyweds to bring prosperity to the couple. We even witnessed a wedding reception where the amount of money given to the couple was announced by the master of ceremony.
The cutting of the cake, drinking of wine, and releasing of white doves (all sealed by a kiss) are still part of most weddings today. Below are some wedding customs and superstitions a marrying Filipino couple should observe, according to tradition and well, the elders.
- The bride must not fit her wedding dress before the big day. If she does, the wedding will not prosper.
- The groom must arrive at the church before the bride to avoid bad luck.
- If the bride wears pearls during the wedding day, she will be an unhappy wife.
- The couple must not see each other the night before the wedding as it will also bring them bad luck.
- A marrying couple is accident-prone so they must avoid long-distance travels for their safety.
- Showering of rice grains and flower petals will bring them prosperity throughout their married life.
- The one on the side of the first unlit candle will die before the other.
- Giving sharp pointed objects as gifts to the newlyweds is a bad choice as this will lead to a broken marriage.
- Bad luck will come to siblings who marry on the same year. Remember the movie ‘Sukob’?
Well, these are just some of the Filipino beliefs that marrying couples here in the Philippines are expected to observe. There’s nothing wrong if we follow old traditions. And it’s up to you if you believe these superstitions. If you want your wedding to push through, it will. If you want your married life to be prosperous and intact, it will be up to you and your partner.
After all, the wedding day is just the beginning of your journey with the one you chose to spend forever with. The day after the wedding and the years to come are more important than the grand celebration you had on your wedding date. Whether you choose to follow old wedding customs or not, what matters is you have the right reason to marry.